


just pretend

by darthswift13



Category: Star Wars Sequel Trilogy
Genre: Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Alternate Universe - Sugar Daddy, F/M, Loss of Virginity, Miscommunication, Praise Kink, Social Media AU, Sugar Daddy Ben Solo, Textfic, Virgin Ben Solo, Virgin Rey (Star Wars)
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-01-14
Updated: 2021-02-15
Packaged: 2021-03-12 07:27:17
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 6
Words: 11,083
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28756599
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/darthswift13/pseuds/darthswift13
Summary: Ben is a super socially awkward and lonely lawyer trying to be a sugar daddy and Rey is equally socially awkward and trying to be a sugar baby. They mistakenly think the other is more experienced, when in reality neither of them has any idea what they’re doing.
Relationships: Rey/Ben Solo, Rey/Ben Solo | Kylo Ren
Comments: 45
Kudos: 305





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> This is an ongoing social media AU that I'm posting over on [ Twitter!](https://twitter.com/darthswift13/status/1348427021173592065?s=20)
> 
> Based on [this prompt!](https://twitter.com/theriseofswolo/status/1346283583774846977?s=20)

* * *

* * *

* * *

_**Rey's Google search history:** _

* * *

* * *

**_Ben's Google search history_ **

**__ **

* * *


	2. Chapter 2

* * *

Rey waits nervously outside her apartment building, fidgeting with the little Kate Spade clutch Kaydel had insisted she buy to go with her way-too-expensive little black dress. Kaydel tried to convince her to buy a pair of Louboutins, but Rey refused to pay almost $700 for a pair of shoes, so she borrowed a pair of pumps from Kaydel instead. She’s not used to wearing high heels, and she’d spent the past 20 minutes practicing walking in them so she wouldn’t look like a penguin in front of Ben. She wants to seem like she’s the glamorous sort of woman who is used to wearing high heels and wearing designer dresses. 

Ben pulls up a few moments later in a black Mercedes. He’s playing classical music loudly enough that she can hear it. He turns the music down and then steps out of the car, looking devilishly handsome in a navy blue suit.

Maybe it’s just because he’s so  _ tall,  _ but he’s so intimidating. She wonders how many sugar babies he’s had in the past. She wonders if he dotes on multiple women. He just has this aura of power and experience. She imagines how he must command a courtroom as an attorney. 

But when he speaks, his voice is soft. Tender, even. 

“You look absolutely beautiful, Rey,” he murmurs. 

She can hear him draw in a shaky breath, almost as if he’s  _ nervous  _ somehow, but that would be preposterous. He leans in and presses a gentle kiss to her cheek and she blushes in spite of herself.

“Oh, um...thanks,” she replies bashfully, nervously tucking a strand of her hair behind her ear as she bites down on her lower lip. 

She feels like she’s already messing this up.

“Er — shall we, then?” Ben asks after a brief awkward silence.

“Right. Of course.”

Rey continues to anxiously fidget with her purse, looking down at her feet to make sure she’s keeping her balance in her high heels. Her heartbeat is blazing thunderously in her ears and her palms are pooling with sweat. 

Ben walks her to the passenger’s side door and opens it for her. She smiles. “Thank you.”

“Of course,” he replies in that soft, low voice that gives her goosebumps.

Ben’s Mercedes is  _ definitely  _ the fanciest car she’s ever been in. The leather seats feel cool under her bare legs. 

He starts the ignition and the loud classical music comes on again, but he quickly turns it down.

“How were your classes today?” Ben asks.

“Exhausting,” Rey admits. “Looking forward to dinner is the only thing that got me through the day, honestly.” There’s another awkward silence punctuated by the soft swell of the symphony music in the background. “How was your day?”

“Er — the same. I was looking forward to seeing you all day.”

The car ride passes with more awkward small talk, and Rey feels like it’s entirely her fault for not being able to make more interesting conversation. She imagines the other sugar babies he’s probably “dated” and how they were probably dazzling and charming and not hopelessly socially awkward like she is. Growing up being bounced from foster home to foster home, she didn’t really have the chance to make friends, but she always had a knack for math and science, so that’s what she poured her time and energy into. People didn’t always make sense, but numbers did, and they were the one constant in her life. 

She’s grateful to have met Rose in her freshman engineering seminar; she introduced Rey to Kaydel, Poe, and Finn. Without Rose, Rey doubts she would’ve made so many friends so quickly. And now here she is trying to be a  _ sugar baby  _ of all things. Being charming is basically in the job description. And she just  _ isn’t.  _

She can’t tell if Ben’s quiet, serious demeanor is from a lack of interest, or if that’s just how he is. But she has a sneaking suspicion it’s the former.

He’s this accomplished and worldly lawyer, and she’s just a college student with a tiny studio apartment and the social prowess of a thumbtack.

💎💎💎

The restaurant is by far the fanciest Rey has ever been to. There are white tablecloths and multiple forks and spoons, and she hasn’t a clue which ones you’re supposed to use and when. Just another thing for her to make a fool of herself over, she supposes.

But when she opens the menu, her face lights up. It’s all in French. She knows French. She’s studied it since secondary school and studied abroad in Paris for a semester.

“My friend Jannah recommended this place, but I didn’t realize the menu was all in French, I’m sorry,” Ben explains.

Rey shakes her head. “Non, non, c’est bon; je peux parler français.”

“Oh, well...that makes one of us,” he admits.

Rey smiles. “I can help you pick something out. What are you in the mood for?”

“What would you recommend?”

“Hmmmm,” Rey says as she peruses the menu. “Well, when I was in Paris I had the most  _ amazing _ Boeuf Bourguignon. It’s a beef stew, basically, but super fancy and delicious. And it pairs really well with Burgundy wine.”

  
“Well, I’m sold. That sounds perfect,” he says with a smile. “When were you in Paris?”

“Oh, last semester, I got a scholarship to study abroad. I miss it terribly.”

“I’ve only been once and I felt like everyone looked down on me because I can barely string together three words in French. I wish you had been there to help me.”

“Maybe next time,” Rey hears herself saying, and she’s surprised at her own boldness. Maybe it’s finally having a topic of conversation that she feels passionate about that emboldens her. 

She immediately regrets it, and goes to backtrack, but Ben says, “I would love that.”

  
  


💎💎💎

Rey is breathtaking in every way imaginable, and Ben feels completely overwhelmed and useless, particularly as he watches her order their meals in perfect French. She’s a vision bathed in warm candlelight wearing a black dress that hugs her curves perfectly, her hair falling in delicate waves to her shoulders. He’s quite convinced she might be the most beautiful woman he’s ever seen, and the fact that she’s interested in him in any way, even if only in this sort of transactional relationship, completely baffles him. 

Once the conversation moves on from Paris, Rey gets quiet again, playing with the ends of her hair. He must be boring her, he thinks. If only he weren’t such a useless conversationalist. He has a hard enough time making small talk in lower stakes situations, let alone with this drop-dead gorgeous woman who’s fluent in French and pursuing a degree in one of the most complicated and challenging majors he can fathom.

“Your hair looks very lovely,” is what he finally manages to stay. 

Her cheeks flush an adorable shade of pink. “Oh, um...thank you.”

There’s another long silence, which is mercifully interrupted by the waiter bringing their wine, which he hopes will make the conversation flow a little more smoothly.

And maybe it’s the wine or slowly growing a little more comfortable talking to her, but Ben is able to open up a little bit more. They talk about Coruscant U and Paris. Ben points out that the restaurant is playing Bizet’s “Carmen”; Rey says she’s not familiar and has never seen an opera, and Ben says he’ll have to take her one day. Usually people see his love for classical music as stuffy and boring, but Rey seems genuinely interested.

“I took piano and voice lessons growing up,” he explains. “And I still love music, it’s a big part of my life.”

“That’s really interesting,” Rey replies. “I would’ve loved to learn an instrument growing up, but — ” she shakes her head. “Nevermind. You said you took voice lessons? So you can sing?”

“I mean...a little bit. Sort of. I don’t know,” he mumbles.

“That’s amazing. I’m sure you’re brilliant. I can barely carry a tune, personally, so I always think it’s really impressive when people can sing.”

They talk more about music — Rey prefers pop music, but she says she can appreciate classical music too, and has always wanted to hear a symphony live. He promises her that he’ll take her to the symphony, too, if she wants.

💎💎💎

After dinner as they walk back to the car, Rey feels Ben awkwardly brush the back of his hand against hers. She wonders if he’s trying to hold her hand, but Ben seems like the kind of person who wouldn’t hesitate to just take someone’s hand if he wanted to. And she doesn’t want to be weird if he  _ isn’t _ trying to hold her hand. So she pulls her hand away, awkwardly folding her arms across her chest.

The car ride back to Rey’s apartment passes mostly in silence except for the sound of the classical music in the background. Rey’s heartbeat blazes in her ears the whole time. What is the expectation now? Should she kiss him? Should she wait for him to kiss her? Should she invite him up to her apartment?

She’s totally at a loss.

When they arrive outside her apartment building she tells him, “Thank you again for dinner. I had a really, really lovely time.” And despite how awkward she was the whole time, she means it. She just hopes she wasn’t so awkward that he never wants to see her again.

“I had a lovely time, too,” he tells her with a smile. There’s another silence and Rey feels her breathing quicken as her eyes dart to his lips. He leans a little bit closer to her and she tilts her head toward him, and then his hand is on her cheek as he pulls her in for a kiss.

It’s chaste, at first; a gentle peck on the lips. But Rey wants more. She leans in again but his mouth is still closed, so she brushes her tongue along his bottom lip and he parts his lips for her. She might be inexperienced sexually, but she’s had her fair share of makeout sessions, and that’s one thing at least that she’s confident in her ability to do. She licks into his mouth and he takes her face in his hands, kissing back just as fervently. 

Rey unbuckles her seat belt and his hand roams down to her waist as he kisses down her neck, and she throws her head back to accommodate him. She guides his hand upward toward her breast, and she notices that his hand is shaking slightly. 

She breaks the kiss. “Are you okay? You’re shaking.”

“I — um — my asthma medication, it makes me shaky, that’s all.”   
  


“Oh, okay,” Rey murmurs, leaning forward and capturing his lips in another kiss. 

She really likes kissing him. His lips are full and soft, and her cunt throbs at the thought of all the other things he could do to her with those lips and that tongue.

She moans when she feels him palm at her breast over her dress, and she can feel herself getting wet.

“Do you want to touch me?” she whispers in his ear.

“Do you want me to touch you?”

“Do you — do you want me to want you to touch me?”   
  


“Wait, what?”

“I — nevermind.” Rey shakes her head. She’s fucking things up.  _ Again.  _ “Sorry. Yes. I want you to touch me.”

“Where — ” he swallows thickly. “Where do you want me to touch you, sweetheart?” he whispers back.

She feels her breathing quicken as her heartbeat races. She takes his hand and guides it between her thighs, up under her dress.

“Here,” she breathes out. 

💎💎💎

This is normally the part where he’d say he wanted to stop. But he doesn’t want to wait anymore. He wants to touch Rey. 

“I — wait,” he says, taking his hand away.

Rey frowns. “What’s wrong?”

“I just — what if someone comes out and sees us?”

“Oh...that’s a good point. Do you, um...did you want to come up to my apartment, then?”

“Oh, um...sure. Yeah. I’ll, um. Yeah. I’ll come up to your apartment.” He tries to sound casual and ends up sounding totally awkward instead. As usual.

He’s already hard as a rock, and normally he would’ve just dropped her off and then went home and jerked off, but he doesn’t want to do that this time. He wants to touch her, and maybe she’ll want to touch him, too.

His brain short circuits for a moment at the thought of that.

“Ben?” Rey says after a moment. “So are you, um... are you going to come inside?” 

“Oh, um, right, yeah, of course.” He turns off the car and takes the key out of the ignition. “Let’s go up to your apartment, then.”

Rey flashes one of those dazzling million watt smiles of hers and he  _ melts. _

💎💎💎

Rey’s studio apartment is small and furnished from Ikea. The most distinguishing feature is the dozens of house plants scattered throughout the small space.

“You have a very nice apartment,” Ben tells her.

Rey shrugs. “Er — it’s not much, but it’s home I suppose.”

They stand there awkwardly for a few moments and then, “So, um...would you like to come sit on the couch?”

Ben nods. “Sure.”

“Great. Perfect.” Rey chews on her lower lip as they make their way over to the couch. 

When she sits down beside him, she notices the scent of his cologne and expensive aftershave. It’s intoxicating. She wants to drown in him.

He leans forward and tucks a strand of her hair behind her ears. 

“You have freckles,” he says softly. “I hadn’t noticed before. They’re very cute.”

She blushes, flashing a bashful smile, and then he leans in and kisses her again. She kisses back languidly, drinking him in, letting their tongues push against each other. His hands roam up and down her torso and lower back, and then he pulls her in closer to him by her waist. 

They kiss each other hungrily, like they had both been dreaming of this.

Ben breaks the kiss and they’re both left struggling to catch their breath.

“What’s that you were, um — ” He swallows nervously. “What’s that you were saying you wanted me to do?”

She bites down on her lower lip and fidgets with the ends of her hair. 

“I want you to touch me, Ben,” she whispers, taking his hand, his  _ stupidly big hand _ and guiding it up between her legs, just under the hem of her dress. He lets his hand rest between her thighs as he captures her lips in another passionate kiss, his shaking hand very slowly making its way up to the lace fabric of her panties. He slowly tugs them down as he continues to kiss her, and she feels her heart starting to race even faster.

No one has ever touched her there before.

They both gasp when he gently,  _ so gently _ lets his fingertip brush through her folds. 

His warm brown eyes are worshipful as they flit up to meet hers.

“Rey,” he says reverently. “You’re so — you’re so wet for me.”

It feels so good she thinks she might pass out. And he’s barely even touched her yet.

He slowly swirls his trembling finger along her entrance, drawing a low moan out of her. It feels like pure electricity. “Does that — does that feel good, sweetheart?”   
  


“Yes. It feels so good. But I want, um...” she takes a deep breath, “I want you to put your finger inside of me.”

He nods, swallowing thickly. “Whatever you want, Rey. I like when you tell me what you want.”

He slowly eases his finger inside of her and Rey grips the couch cushions for purchase. “ _ Oh!”  _ she cries out.

He pauses, concern flickering in his eyes. “Is that okay? Did I hurt you?”

She shakes her head. “No, no, it’s perfect, please don’t stop.”

He smiles and slides his finger in the rest of the way. It’s not lost on her that, as much as she wants it to be insignificant, he’s the first person to ever touch her like this, to ever put their finger inside of her. She can’t pretend it’s insignificant.

But for some reason, she’s glad it’s with Ben. He makes her feel safe.

“Does that still feel good?”

She whimpers. “Yes, Ben, it’s so good. So, so good. I love how it feels when you touch me like this.”

He starts to move his finger and  _ fuck  _ it’s already a million times better than he own stupid little fingers. 

She moans deeply. She grips at the couch cushions until her knuckles turn white. 

“ _ Ben,”  _ she whimpers, instinctively starting to cant her hips. 

He pauses briefly. “May I, um — may I try something?” he asks.

Rey nods. “What, um — what do you want to try?”

“I want — ” he takes a deep breath, “I want to go down on you.”

“Fuck. Yes. Please, Ben.”

💎💎💎

If he wasn’t shaking before, he’s definitely shaking now. But he wants to do everything he can to make her feel good. And he’s very curious about how it will feel, how it will taste. He’s always wondered, always wanted to try.

He gets down on his knees and gently hikes her dress up before slowly pulling her panties off the rest of the way. He looks up at Rey and watches her watch him, her shoulders rising and falling with the effort of her labored breaths. 

She spreads her legs out for him, and he hesitantly kisses the inside of each thigh.

He hooks her legs over his shoulders so he can pull her cunt close to his face. And then he leans forward and licks a hot stripe up her middle and  _ holy fuck  _ it’s  _ everything.  _ She tastes so good, so sweet. He wants to devour her.

She cries out, her hands coming down to knot into his hair.

“ _ Oh _ , Ben,” she whimpers.

He’s not exactly sure what he’s doing, only that he wants to bury his face in her cunt, to explore it with his lips and his tongue, to see if he can make her come for him like this. 

The thought of making her come sends a thrill through him.

He moans against her cunt as he presses his face into her, licking and sucking with a fervent desperation.

He can’t believe he let himself miss out on this for all these years.

But still, he’s glad that Rey is the first person he’s sharing this with. He can’t imagine this moment being any more perfect. Like it was always meant to be with her. 

She’s so responsive to each caress of his tongue as it flicks in and out of her center, and he loves discovering all the ways he can make her whimper and moan.

“Ben, I’m —  _ oh —  _ I’m gonna  _ —” _ she arches her back, _ “Fuck —” _

He slides his finger inside of her again as he sucks on her clit because he wants to feel her as she hits her peak. And just like that she comes undone around his finger, her inner walls rippling around him. She cries out his name as she comes for him.

It sends a thrill through him that he did this. He made a woman come.

  
He made  _ Rey _ come.

💎💎💎

Rey takes a moment to catch her breath.

She didn’t know it was possible for a person to come that hard. Every orgasm she’d ever given herself seems like a tiny ripple in a pond in comparison, but  _ this —  _ this was like a tidal wave.

“Was that good for you, sweetheart?” she hears him asking. 

While she has nothing to compare it to,  _ good  _ seems like an incredible understatement.

“Yes,” she pants out, still trying to catch her breath, “It was so good, Ben.”

He smiles at her. 

“Good,” he murmurs. “I want to make you feel good, Rey.”

He sits down beside her and kisses her again. She can taste the sweet tang of herself on his lips and his tongue, and there’s something intoxicating about it.

She breaks the kiss. “Ben,” she whispers, “Can I touch you now? Please?”

He nods. “Yes, of course.”

Rey takes a deep breath and then starts kissing him again as she fumbles to undo his belt. He helps her along, unbuttoning and unzipping his pants.

Now her hands are trembling slightly. She hesitantly reaches forward, puts her hands in his boxers and pulls out his cock.

Her eyes widen. He’s  _ big _ . Very big. She gulps, wondering how she’s going to fit him in her mouth. 

Nevertheless, she’s determined. She wants to make him feel good the way he made her feel good.

He’s breathing so heavily she can hear each of his panting breaths. 

She bites down on her lower lip. And then hesitantly strokes his shaft.

He groans loudly.

“Is that good? Do you like that?”

“Yes,” he says hoarsely. “Please don’t stop, Rey.”

She takes another deep breath and strokes his cock once, twice, three times. She watches the way his eyes flutter shut as she touches him. She builds a rhythm, pumping his cock.

“ _ Rey _ ,” he murmurs contentedly. 

“Ben? Can I ask you something?” 

He opens his eyes. “Yes, sweetheart?”

“Can, I um — may I try something now?” she asks nervously.

“What do you want to try?”

“I want — ” she takes a deep breath, “I want to go down on you, too.”

His eyes widen and he gulps. “I — yes, of course, Rey. You don’t — you don’t have to though, if you don’t want to, just because I — ”

“I want to, Ben,” she says fiercely. “Please.”

He swallows hard, nodding permissively. “Okay. As long as it’s what you want.”

“It is,” she assures him.

And then she gets down on her knees. His eyes widen and his breathing quickens even more. 

She takes his cock in her hand again and strokes it a few more times, enjoying the heavy feeling of it in her hand.

She slowly presses gentle kisses down his shaft, and then hesitantly puts his cock inside her mouth, just the tip to start off. She closes her lips around it and gives it a few investigatory sucks. He moans deeply.

“ _ Rey _ .” 

She takes it out of her mouth again and licks a hot stripe up his length, making him moan. Her eyes dart upward to gauge his reactions. His eyes are shut, lips parted, and he’s breathing heavily.

She puts his cock back in her mouth and sucks on it more intently and rhythmically, humming contentedly. She likes the feeling of him in her mouth. She tries to take more of him, but she accidentally scrapes her teeth against his shaft, and he hisses out a breath in pain. 

“ _ Ah,”  _ he blurts out. 

She immediately pulls him out of her mouth. She knew she would fuck this up. “Oh my God, I’m so sorry, are you okay?”

“It’s okay, I’m okay, sweetheart. It was an accident. You’re fine,” he says reassuringly. “You can keep going.”

She nods. “I really am sorry.”

He gently runs a hand through her hair. “I know you are. It’s okay. Really.”

She takes a deep breath and eases him into her mouth again, taking care to cover her teeth with her lips this time.

She wants to see how much of him she can take, so she tries Poe’s trick of squeezing her left thumb. She eases more and more of his cock into her mouth, relishing in the way he moans as she takes him inch by inch, until she feels his cock brushing against the back of her throat. She still gags a tiny bit, but she thinks the trick must be helping because she’s not gagging as much as she would expect.

He must have noticed her little gag because he asks, “Are you okay? Did I hurt you? Do you need to stop?” His tone is so gentle and considerate.

She shakes her head without taking him out of her mouth. She’s determined to get this right. She wants to give him the same pleasure he gave her. 

She sucks on him more intently, building a rhythm. 

“Yes, just like that, that feels so good, sweetheart,” she hears him saying.

She hums contentedly again. She likes doing this for him, likes making him feel good.

He reaches down and takes her face in his hand, tenderly stroking her cheek with his thumb. 

“God, you’re so beautiful,” he murmurs. “Look at you, taking my cock in your mouth so perfectly. Such a good girl.”

His praise encourages her even further, and she moans as she sucks even more fervently. He groans deeply, throwing his head back. 

“Rey,  _ fuck _ , oh my God, I’m gonna — ” 

It takes her by surprise when his cum starts to pour down her throat and she nearly chokes but she starts swallowing it dutifully. It tastes strange to her, maybe a little bitter, but not unpleasant. 

She slowly pulls his cock out of her mouth, trying to catch her breath. 

She stands up and settles herself in his lap. “Was that good?”

She feels insecure, knowing he’s probably gotten better blow jobs from far more experienced women, women who wouldn’t accidentally scrape him with their teeth. 

“So good,” he murmurs reassuringly. He kisses her neck and nuzzles his face against it. She wraps her arms around his neck, and he wraps his arms around her waist. They linger like that for a long moment, breathing each other in. 

💎💎💎

He could stay holding her like this all night long, if she’d let him. But he remembers what she put on her profile:  _ friends with benefits, no strings attached.  _

  
But she lets him hold her for a while, and he’s grateful for each moment she’s in his arms. He lets his hands run gently up and down her back.

Eventually he hears her saying in a soft voice, “I’m supposed to meet some classmates at the library for a group project in the morning, and I’m getting tired, so, um...”

Ben nods. “Right. Of course. I’ll get going then.”

“Thank you, um...thank you again for dinner and everything. I had a really lovely time.”

“Same here. Can we do this again sometime?”

“Definitely.”

Ben smiles. “I’ll text you?”   
  


Rey nods. “Sounds good.”

Their lips meet in a slow, tender kiss, and then Ben pulls up his pants and buckles his belt. 

Rey walks him to the door and they kiss once more.

“I hope you sleep well, sweetheart.”

“You, too.”

  
  


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* * *


	3. Chapter 3

* * *

**_The Next Day_ **

* * *

* * *

**_Friday Night_ **

* * *

Rey waits nervously for Ben to arrive, smoothing out her green silk dress that feels too fancy, like it was made for someone so much more glamorous than she is. She still feels awkward in her high heels, and is convinced she’s going to fall down and make a fool of herself in front of Ben.

  


Ben arrives a few minutes later looking dapper in a well-fitting black suit with a bow tie. He swallows hard when he approaches her, before leaning in and giving her a quick kiss on the cheek.

  


“You look — you look _stunning_ ,” he stammers. “Green suits you — it, um, it brings out the green in your eyes.”

  


She blushes and smiles bashfully as she nervously plays with the ends of her hair. “Oh, um...thank you.”

  


There is an awkward silence, but then Ben clears his throat and says, “Shall we?”  
  


“Oh, right, yes,” Rey replies awkwardly.

  


She curses herself for being so impossibly awkward, and wonders why Ben continues to want to spend time with her when there are surely more interesting — and more experienced — women he could be spoiling instead. It doesn’t make any sense that he wants _her._

  


He opens the car door for her and she smiles and thanks him, and then they are sitting in his car in the awkward silence again. 

  


“How was your day?” Ben asks after a moment.

  


“Not great. I missed the bus and I was late to class, and my professor chewed me out in front of everyone.”

  


Ben frowns, brows pushing together “That’s horrible, I’m so sorry. There’s no reason for the professor to call you out in front of the whole class, especially if you’re not usually late.”

  


“Yeah, exactly, thank you. It’s just so frustrating because I was literally almost to the bus stop, but the bus came a minute early and wouldn’t stop for me.”

  


Ben’s frown deepens. “I’m getting you an Uber gift card.”

  


“Oh, you don’t have to do that — ”  
  


“No, really, I insist. It’ll save you a lot of time that you could be using to study, and you won’t have to worry about buying bus passes anymore, and you won’t have to deal with busses coming early or late or anything like that.”

  


“Oh, um, wow, well... that’s very kind of you.”  
  


He smiles. “I told you I want to spoil you, Rey.”

  


He hesitantly reaches over with a trembling hand — asthma medication, her brain supplies, his asthma medication makes him shaky — and rests it on top of Rey’s, giving her hand a gentle squeeze. She squeezes back.

  


“What is the symphony performing tonight?” she asks after a moment.

  


His face lights up when she asks him this. “Dvořák’s symphony number 9. It’s one of the most famous and popular symphonies of all time. I think you’re really going to like it. Or at least, I hope you will. It’s really, really beautiful music from the late Romantic period.”

  


Rey smiles. She likes watching how excited he gets when he talks about music; it’s very endearing. 

  


💎💎💎

He opens the door for her when they arrive at the concert hall, and this time he doesn’t just try to brush his hand against hers in hopes she’ll get the hint; instead, he takes a deep breath, reaches over and entwines their hands. Rey turns and smiles at him. She’s blushing slightly, and he’s convinced he’s never seen anything more adorable. 

  


They walk hand-in-hand across the street and to the door of the concert hall. 

  


“Where are we sitting?” Rey asks as she steps onto the red carpet of the theater. 

  


“Oh, I’m a patron of the orchestra and have box seats,” Ben replies matter-of-factly.

  


“Oh wow,” Rey replies, “that’s really cool.”

  


“You think so?”  
  


She nods. “Definitely. I’ve never sat in box seats before. Then again, I’ve never been to the symphony at all.”  
  


Ben grins. “You’re in for a real treat, sweetheart.” He sincerely hopes she’ll enjoy the symphony as much as he does. 

  


💎💎💎

  


His eyes should be on the orchestra, but instead they’re glued to Rey, taking in her every reaction, watching the way she slowly seems to become more and more mesmerized by the breathtakingly beautiful music. 

  


At one point she turns and faces him, biting down on her lower lip as she hesitantly reaches over to take his hand in hers, before turning back to face the orchestra again. Her palm is slightly sweaty, but he doesn’t mind in the slightest. 

  


By the time the performance is over, Ben notices a tear escape from Rey’s eye. She immediately stands up and joins the rest of the audience in giving the orchestra a standing ovation.

  


💎💎💎

  


“So, did you like it, then?” Ben asks once the audience stops clapping and begins shuffling out.

  


“That was...magical,” Rey replies breathlessly. “I never knew — I’ll be honest, I always thought classical music was kind of boring but that was _beautiful,_ and there’s something so exciting about hearing it live. Can we go again sometime?”

  


“Absolutely. Whenever you want to go, just say the word. I’d gladly take you every weekend, if you really wanted to.”

  


“We still have to go see the opera, too,” she reminds him.

  


“Oh, that’s right. I’ll have to look at the Coruscant Opera’s season and see what operas they’re doing. I’ll try and pick one that I think you’d like and that I think will be accessible for someone who is new to opera.”

  


Rey smiles. “I’d love that.”

  


“Really?”

  


She nods. “Definitely. Growing up, I didn’t really have the chance to do these kinds of things because — well, nevermind. Either way, I’m happy I get to have these experiences now.”

  


“I’m happy I can help you have these experiences,” Ben replies earnestly. “And if there’s anything else you can think of that you’ve always wanted to do, we can do that, too. We can do whatever you want, Rey. Whatever will make you happy.”

  


Rey isn’t exactly sure what she’s done to deserve this devastatingly handsome and absurdly wealthy man doting on her like this, but she isn’t about to complain, even though a part of her thinks it’s too good to be true and is just waiting for the other shoe to drop.

  


💎💎💎

  


They make their way back to the car hand-in-hand, and Ben opens the door for her, as usual. 

  


There’s another awkward silence in the car, so Ben turns up the music a little bit.

  


“What’s this piece called?” Rey asks.

  


“This is Tchaikovsky’s Swan Lake Waltz. It’s one of my absolute favorite pieces.”

  


“It’s lovely,” she replies, humming along a little bit.

  


“I’m glad you like it, sweetheart,” Ben murmurs, reaching over to take her hand again. 

  


The rest of the ride continues like that, Rey humming along to the music contentedly as she traces patterns on the back of Ben’s hand with her thumb, not minding how sweaty his palms are because she knows hers are sweaty too.

  


When they arrive at Rey’s apartment, he parks his car, and they make their way upstairs together. 

  


Rey locks the door behind them and then hangs up her keys on the hook by the door. 

  


“Do you, um...do you care to sit down?” Rey asks.

  


Ben swallows hard and nods, following her to the couch. 

  


They sit there awkwardly for a few moments before Rey takes matters into her own hands, grabbing his face and kissing him. He makes a surprised but not displeased sound and wastes no time kissing her back fervently, licking into her mouth in a way that makes her moan as he pulls her in closer by her waist with shaking hands.

  


She guides his hand up to touch her breast, and he palms at it clumsily as he continues to kiss her deeply. She trails kisses down his neck, leaving lipstick marks there, making him moan softly. 

  


“Ben,” she whispers. She takes a deep breath. “I — I want you. I want all of you.”  
  


“Yes, I — I, um... I want that, too. I want you, I mean.”

  


“Do you, um...do you want to go to my bed, then?”

  


He nods almost too enthusiastically and she smiles, entwining their hands and leading them there as her heartbeat drums loudly in her ears.

  


💎💎💎

  


She sits at the edge of her bed and he sits beside her, and their lips meet again in a searing, desperate kiss as Rey sets to work untying his bowtie and slowly and hesitantly undoing the buttons on his shirt with trembling fingers. He shrugs off his suit jacket and shirt in turn, letting them fall to the floor. She breaks the kiss briefly, lips parting as she drinks in the sight of him, all broad shoulders and taut muscles. She slowly reaches over and lets her fingertips run back and forth along his shoulders, mesmerized and fascinated, eager to explore every inch of him. 

  


“Rey,” he murmurs hoarsely, pulling her in for another kiss. He leans forward and she falls back against the bed. His hand glides up and down her torso as he kisses her hungrily, until his hand makes its way to her back, hesitating at the zipper to her dress. 

  


She hears him take a deep breath. “Is this — I mean — may I — er — is this okay?”

  


For someone who is surely experienced, he seems so... _hesitant_. And maybe even nervous. But maybe he’s just trying to be respectful and patient. It is only their second time together, after all. And part of her is glad he’s so hesitant, because she’s nervous. _So_ nervous. 

  


She nods, sitting up and brushing her hair to the side so he can more easily access the zipper. He slowly pulls it down and she slides it off her shoulders before pulling it off the rest of the way and letting it join his clothes on the floor. She takes her heels off, and he takes that as his cue to take his shoes off, too.

  


He hesitates again, eyes slowly running across her now nearly naked frame, save for a lacy little black bralette and matching panties, and she takes a deep breath and whispers, “Kiss me, Ben.”

  


He nods and does as she asks, leaning forward and letting their lips meet again as she guides his hands to her breasts. He kneads them in his hands, those stupidly big hands of his, and she moans, arching her back.

  


“Yes, Ben, that feels so good,” she groans. He reaches behind her to get to her bra clasp, and she sits up a little to make it easier for him, but he can’t quite seem to undo it.

  


He looks very frustrated, his brow knitting together. It’s very endearing. She giggles.

  


“Here, let me help,” she murmurs, reaching around and unhooking it for him.

  


His lips part as she shrugs off the bralette, his eyes worshipful. 

  


“You’re so beautiful,” he says breathlessly. He takes a deep, shaking breath and then trails kisses down her neck until his lips find her breasts. He hesitates briefly, eyes flitting up to meet hers as if asking for permission, and she nods vigorously. That’s all the encouragement he needs to take one of her breasts in his mouth and suck at it, tongue swirling around her pebbled nipple, his hand palming at her other breast.

  


“Yes, Ben, _fuck,_ that feels so good,” she whimpers. He does the same to the other breast, sucking at it with abandon, and it feels _incredible._ She can already feel herself getting so wet.

  


She takes his hand and guides it down towards her panties, and he slowly dips his hand inside. He draws in a shaking, shuddering breath. “So wet for me,” he murmurs reverently.

  


“Touch me, Ben, please, I need it, I need — ”

  


He slowly tugs off her panties and lets his finger run through her wet folds. “What do you need, sweetheart? Tell me.”

  


“Will you — will go down on me again?” she asks nervously. 

  


He grins, a crooked wolfish smile, and then his head disappears between her legs and she cries out. The way he licks and sucks at her is somehow even better than before, if that’s even possible, and she knots her hands into his hair, rocking her hips instinctively.

  


It feels so good that she almost forgets how nervous she is.

  


Almost.

  


But it doesn’t take long for her to come, leaving her a babbling, whimpering mess, briefly forgetting her anxiety.

  


She feels him kissing her again, and she can taste herself on his lips and his tongue. Her heart is beating very fast now in anticipation of what is about to happen.

  


She remembers how big he is, and wonders if he will even fit inside of her.

  


She hears him unbuckle his belt, and then he breaks the kiss to take his pants off, leaving him in only a pair of black boxers.

  


He kisses her gently, and she reaches down into his boxers, hand wrapping around his length, and he groans.

  


“ _Rey_.” 

  


“I want you inside of me,” she whispers. And she really, truly does, she’s just a little scared.

  


He gulps and then nods. Is he as nervous as she is? No, that’s not possible, she assures herself. Surely he’s done this loads of times.

  


She pulls her hand away and he takes off his boxers, springing his cock free. He pauses for a moment. “Wait, let me just get a condom out of my pocket.”

  


Rey nods, breathing quickening as her heartbeat drums in her ears. She watches him take the condom out of his pocket, rip the package open, and roll the condom on, gingerly setting the wrapper on her nightstand. 

  


He leans down and kisses her again, and then she feels his cock nudging at her entrance.

  


“Wait,” she blurts out suddenly.

  


Ben breaks the kiss, immediately pulling back from her and looking concerned. “Are you okay? Do you want to stop?”

  


“I — I’m just suddenly feeling quite unwell.”

  


He frowns, brows furrowing in concern. “What’s wrong? Can I do anything to help? Do you need a glass of water or something?” 

  


“No, it’s alright, I’m fine, I just — I’m just suddenly quite tired, is all.”

  


“Oh, okay....well, do you want to watch a movie or something instead? Or should I let you get some rest?”

  


Rey feigns a yawn. “I think it would be best if I got some sleep, yeah.”

  


He kisses her forehead. “Okay, sweetheart,” he murmurs gently. “Will you text me in the morning and let me know how you’re feeling?”

  


She nods.

  


“I hope you’re able to get some rest and that you’ll be feeling better in the morning,” he says softly. He kisses her, and then busies himself with getting dressed. Once he’s fully clothed he leans down to kiss her once more. “Good night, sweetheart.”

  


“Good night, Ben.”

  


Once he’s closed the door behind him, she buries her face into her pillow, suppressing a tiny scream. What on earth has she gotten herself into?

* * *

* * *

**The Next Morning**

* * *


	4. Chapter 4

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Note: Things are going to start getting more angsty from here. Rey has trust and abandonment issues, and those are going to continue to impact the story and her choices. Please be patient with her and understand that she has things she is working through. I've had a lot of issues with people saying rude things about Rey in my past fics, so if you don't like how I'm writing her, you can just choose not to read the fic, but please don't say rude things about her. Thank you for understanding, and thank you for all your lovely comments so far! I hope you enjoy the update! <3

* * *

**_Friday Night_ **

Rey is beginning to believe she will never get used to wearing these fancy dresses. She fusses with the wine red velvet fabric of her dress, repeatedly shifting it and smoothing it out. It helps calm her nerves.

Ben greets her with a kiss, this time on the lips instead of on her cheek, and it makes her blush. 

“This dress is — you look — wow,” he finally manages to say. “Just — just stunning, as always.”

Her blush deepens and she fidgets with the ends of her hair. “Thank you,” she mumbles nervously.

He takes her hand and walks her to the car, opening the door for her as usual. Once they’re both sitting down, he reaches into the back seat and retrieves a small box wrapped in silver wrapping paper. 

“For you,” he says softly.

“Oh wow, um, I wasn’t expecting a gift. Thank you.”

“I told you I’m going to spoil you, Rey. You should get used to this kind of thing.”

She highly doubts she’ll  _ ever _ get used to any of this. She smiles at him gratefully as she gently tears off the wrapping paper, and then opens the box, revealing the most beautiful little jewel pendant — cubic zirconia, she figures — on a delicate gold chain. “Oh my, it’s  _ beautiful,  _ Ben, thank you.”

“It’s a real diamond,” he tells her, and she nearly chokes. She never in a million years imagined she would ever own a  _ real diamond,  _ unless she got married or something, though she’d always doubted that would ever be in the cards for her. “Here, I’ll help you put it on,” he says softly. 

She nods and hands him the box, gently swooping her hair over to one side. With trembling hands, he gingerly removes the necklace from the box and slowly puts the necklace on for her. She turns around again and lets her hair fall back into place.

“How does it look?”

He smiles. “It’s almost as beautiful as you are,” he says softly.

She’d been lying to Kaydel, of course, when she said she didn’t like him as anything more than her sugar daddy. And maybe lying to herself a little, too. But of  _ course _ she likes him. 

Maybe that’s why she’s so damn nervous. 

She doesn’t know how to respond to such sweet words in any way other than kissing him, so she does, capturing his lips in a kiss that is slow and tender and deep. 

When she breaks the kiss, Ben gently brushes her hair behind her ear. They hold each other’s gaze for a long, tense moment, until Ben finally says, “Are you ready to go, then?”

She nods, pulling back to her seat and putting on her seat belt.

💎💎💎

Ben watches as Rey’s eyes widen while she takes in the sight of the opulent opera house with its ornate gold ceilings and a glimmering chandelier. Ben has box seats for the opera, too, and he loves the way Rey seems so very impressed by that. 

He has sat alone at this opera house so many times, and always longed to have someone he could take to see the opera with him, so he wasn’t sitting in this box all by himself. Now the most beautiful woman he’s ever laid eyes on is sitting beside him looking stunning in a red dress, and it’s like suddenly all those years of loneliness have been washed away.

He hopes she likes it enough to want to come back again. He doesn’t want to go back to the days of watching the operas all alone.

💎💎💎

He loves watching Rey watch the opera, the way she loses herself in it, being brought to tears more than once, and finally being one of the first to leap up for a standing ovation at the end.

He decides he loves watching Rey’s enthusiasm even more than he loved watching the opera itself. And even though Rey will probably only ever see him as the man who pays her college tuition and buys her nice things, this will always mean something more to him, and he’s grateful to have her company, even if he longs for something more, for something real. He thought this “arrangement” would be enough to make him happy, but that was before he met Rey.

He tries not to dwell on this, though. He’s eager to get back to her apartment, because from the moment he saw her in that red velvet dress that perfectly hugs her every curve, he hasn’t been able to stop thinking about all the ways he wants to touch her. He still feels like he’s totally useless in bed, but he must be doing something right, because he’s managed to make Rey come twice now. He wants to learn all the things he can do to make her feel good and all the different ways he can make her come undone. 

“So, what did you think?” he asks once the applause starts to die down.

“It was so good!” Rey exclaimed. “I honestly thought it would be boring, but it was really dramatic and enthralling and I got so wrapped up in it. And the music was so beautiful, all the singers were amazing. I would definitely go to the opera again.”

He smiles as he reaches forward to take her hand. “I’m so glad you liked it, sweetheart. And we can go again whenever you want.”

💎💎💎 

On the car ride back to her apartment, Rey nervously fidgets with the chain on her Yves Saint Laurent bag. 

“Is everything okay?” Ben asks. “You’ve just been really quiet since we left the opera.”

She looks up. “Oh, everything’s fine — sorry, just zoned out for a bit there.”  _ Just tell him,  _ she tells herself.  _ Just say the words. You can do it: This will be my first time having sex.  _ She takes a deep breath and opens her mouth, but the words die at the back of her throat.

  
“Are you sure? You’re not feeling unwell again, are you?”

“Everything’s great,” she assures him. 

💎💎💎 

She has the perfect idea to get her out of the whole virginity conversation. 

They’re making out on her couch when she breaks the kiss and says, “You know, I never thanked you properly for the bag, and I wanted to thank you for the necklace, too.”

His brows push together in confusion. “You said thank you already, though? I don’t understand.”   
  


“Let me  _ show _ you then,” she replies, surprised at her own boldness. 

And then she sinks to her knees. She starts to unbutton his pants, but he stops her, gently grabbing her wrist. “Rey, you don’t have to, I hope you don’t think I expect — ”

“I  _ want  _ to. Please.”

He lets go of her wrist.

“Well, in that case...”

She gingerly pulls down the zipper on his pants, and they both draw in a sharp breath as she pulls his cock out of his boxers. She still feels like she doesn’t know what she’s doing, but she takes a deep breath and licks along his length before guiding him into her mouth and sucking, making him groan deeply.

“Rey, sweetheart, that feels so good, you have no idea.”

She hums contentedly at his praise, sucking harder. She does a better job this time, she thinks, because she doesn’t manage to scrape her teeth against him. And she feels like she has a better idea of what she’s doing and what he likes. 

“Yes, just like that sweetheart, you’re so good at that, fuck, I’m gonna — ”

He comes with a grunt, spilling onto her tongue and down her throat. She drinks it all up, swallowing it down dutifully before pulling him out of her mouth and licking her lips.

“It was good, then?” she asks nervously as she stands up and then settles into his lap. 

“Of course,” he murmurs, leaning forward to kiss her jaw and then her neck. “But it’s your turn now. Can I take you to your bed, sweetheart? I want you to be comfortable.”

She nods, taking his hand and leading him there. They kick off their shoes and he shrugs off his suit jacket and loosens his tie, rolling up his sleeves. Rey struggles to get the zipper on her dress, and he stops her, murmuring, “Let me,” as he rests one hand on her waist and gingerly pulls the zipper down with the other.

She lets the dress fall to the floor, and then turns around and sits on his lap.

“God, you’re so fucking gorgeous,” he mumbles. “Will you, um — will you lie down for me?”

She nods, lying back against her pillows. When he looks at her, his gaze is full of awe and reverence. 

  
He whispers sweet things into her skin about how beautiful and sexy and perfect she is, kissing her neck and all down her chest and her belly until he gets to her panties. He gently pulls them down past her ankles and then onto the floor. 

He lets his fingers glide between her labia, finding her dripping wet for him. “God, you’re always so wet for me,” he murmurs appreciatively. 

He kisses both of her inner thighs, and then his tongue moves inside of her. 

She grips the sheets for purchase as she cries out.

He flits his eyes up to meet hers, his gaze dark and adoring and full of resolve, so she closes her eyes, because it  _ scares  _ her to be looked at like that.

It scares her almost as much as her ever-growing feelings that she’s trying so desperately to ignore.

She moans loudly when she comes, a shock of blinding pleasure coursing through her veins, her legs shaking as he continues to lick at her through her orgasm. 

He gives her a moment to catch her breath and then he kisses her softly before pulling her close against his chest, his hand running up and down her back in gentle circles.

He’s so tender with her, so intimate; it’s nothing like she imagined having a sugar daddy would be like. And she feels an all-too-familiar flutter of panic in her chest, reminding her she can’t possibly let herself fall for him, can’t possibly let her walls down because he will eventually  _ leave.  _ Everyone always leaves. It’s an inevitability.

And it’s not like someone she met on Seeking Arrangements looking for a sugar baby wants anything real with her, anyway. 

So she sits up and feigns a yawn. “I’m really tired and was planning to do some studying in the morning, I’ve got a big exam coming up on Monday, so...”

There’s the faintest glimmer of hurt in his eyes, but then he nods, understanding.

“Right. Of course,” Ben says quietly.

“I’ll text you.”

“Sounds good.”

He picks up his suit jacket off the floor and slides it back on as he steps into his shoes. He walks back over to Rey and kisses her forehead as he pulls her blankets over her. “I hope you sleep well, and good luck on your exam.”

“Thanks, Ben. Goodnight.”

He gently kisses her lips, and then with that, he’s gone.

She hates how she misses him the moment he closes the door behind him.

  
  



	5. Chapter 5

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> [This](https://img.ltwebstatic.com/images2_pi/2019/06/12/1560326324785905863_thumbnail_600x799.webp) is how I picture the dress Rey wears when she goes to see Ben! Also, I'm aware that "Pride and Prejudice" is technically no longer on Netflix, but in this universe, it is, haha. Thank you as always for all your lovely comments, they're always greatly appreciated. This story is wrapping up now; we've just got one chapter left! Thanks so much for reading, and I hope you've enjoyed it <3

* * *

**_On Friday night, Rey has a little too much to drink and texts Ben._ **

* * *

* * *

**_The next morning_ **

* * *

* * *

Rey gets out of her Uber and smooths out the short red polka dot wrap dress she’s wearing as she looks up at the tall building that houses Ben’s penthouse in downtown Coruscant. The doorman lets her in and she steps onto the elevator, pressing the button for the highest floor. Her hands are shaking a bit and her heart is beating quickly. She feels like she’s maybe, finally ready to tell him.

When he opens the door, he’s dressed more casually than she’s ever seen him, in a black t-shirt and dark jeans. The t-shirt is form-fitting and emphasizes how muscular he is, and he looks as devastatingly handsome as ever, especially when he  _ smiles  _ at her.

“Hi, sweetheart,” he says softly, leaning forward to kiss her. “You look lovely, as always.”   
  


Rey blushes and pushes her hair behind her ear. “Um, thanks,” she says shyly.

“Do you, um, do you want to come inside?” Ben asks.

  
Rey nods and he steps out of the way to let her inside and then closes the door behind her.

Ben’s apartment is exactly what she expected, all black and chrome and leather. Very elegant and expensive looking, but not particularly cozy.

“You have a very nice place,” Rey tells him.

“I’m glad you think so. I’m really happy you’re here.” He takes a step closer to her and gently brushes her hair behind her ear. “You really do look so, so beautiful.”

Her blush deepens. “Why are you so sweet to me?”   
  


“I’m just telling the truth.”

She does the only thing she can think of in response to that: she takes his face in her hands and kisses him. He kisses back hungrily, like he’d missed her, like he’d been waiting for this.

He kisses her jaw and then sets to work kissing her neck, sucking at it.

Rey giggles. “Ben, stop, you’re going to give me a hickey.”

He pulls his lips away and it feels like agony.

“Why don’t I give you a hickey somewhere else, then?” he offers.

Rey raises her eyebrows. “Yeah? Where?”

“I have a few ideas,” he mumbles as his lips find hers again and his hand drifts up to palm at her breast, and she moans. “But both places would involve me taking you to my bed. If that’s, um— if that’s alright with you.”

“Please,” she says breathlessly, and it’s all the encouragement he needs to scoop her up into his arms. Rey yelps. “What are you doing?”

“Taking you to my bed,” he informs her matter-of-factly. She can tell he’s shaking a little bit, and she’s beginning to wonder if it’s really his asthma medication, or if he’s just that nervous around her. 

He lays her down on his white comforter like she’s the most precious thing in the world. He kisses her tenderly, his trembling hands making their way to where her dress is tied. “Is this okay?” he whispers. She nods, and he smiles, gently untying it. When her dress falls open, his eyes widen at the sight of her lacy white bralette and matching panties.

He takes his time with her, kissing down her neck as he unhooks her bra — he actually manages to do it himself this time.

“This is where I was thinking of giving you a hickey,” he tells her, before he starts sucking bruises onto her tits with a glint in his eye, making her arch her back and cry out as she grips the sheets for purchase.

Once her breasts are quite purple with love bites he kisses down her belly, and then sucks at her thighs, leaving bruises there, too. He gently tugs down her panties and then lets one finger glide through her folds.

“Fuck, I can’t believe how we you always are for me,” he murmurs appreciatively. He dips his head between her legs and wastes no time delving his tongue inside of her, making her groan loudly.

He licks and sucks at her with such single-minded fervor that it doesn’t take long for her to reach her peak.

“God, you’re so beautiful when you come for me,” she hears him murmur as he sits up, kissing her with wet lips that taste like her. 

“Ben,” she whimpers, “I need you inside of me.”

“Are you sure?”

  
She nods. Because this time she  _ is _ sure. She feels ready. She feels safe with him. She trusts him. 

He smiles and pulls his shirt over his head, taking her breath away as usual, and then makes short work of taking off his pants and boxers. His cock is so red and hard and already leaking a bead of precome as he hastily rolls the condom on, and she takes the opportunity to quickly shrug off her dress the rest of the way and let it fall to the floor. 

She lies down again and he leans down and captures her lips in a slow, tender kiss. She gasps when she feels his cock nudging at her entrance. 

“ _ Wait _ ,” she says quickly.

Ben frowns. “Are you okay? Do you want to stop?”

“No, it’s okay, I’m okay, and I don’t want to stop, I just — ” she takes a deep breath, squeezing her eyes shut. “Thisismyfirsttime.” She says it so fast it sounds like one word. 

There’s a beat that feels like an eternity, and she’s about to say something when she hears him breathe a sigh of relief. “Me, too.”

Her eyes fly open. “Wait,  _ what? _ ”

“It’s my first time, too.”

“But — you just seemed so intimidating and like you know what you’re doing.”

He chuckles. “I assure you, I am as lost you are, sweetheart.”

She smiles. “Thank God I’m not the only one.”

“I’ve liked figuring it out with you, though,” he says softly, brushing a stray strand of her hair behind her ear. “Do you want to keep trying to figure it out together?”

She nods. “Yeah. I do.”

“I’ll go slowly, I promise, and if I hurt you or you feel uncomfortable at any point, please tell me, okay?”   
  


“Okay,” she nods again, “I will.”

He takes a deep breath. “Are you ready?”

She nods her assent. 

She draws in a shaky breath as she feels him nudge at her entrance once more. He presses into her slowly and she inhales sharply.

His dark eyes are gentle and full of concern. “Are you okay? Did I hurt you?”

“No, it’s okay, it just feels — it feels strange — it does sort of sting a little, but it’s okay. I don’t want you to stop.”

“Okay,” he says softly, giving her a gentle kiss. Her breath comes in little hitched whimpers and gasps as he stretches her out, until finally he’s sheathed all the way inside of her. 

He leans down and kisses her forehead, both of her cheeks, and finally, her lips. “You’re so beautiful Rey, and you’re taking me so well. How does it feel? Does it hurt?”

She shakes her head. “No. It feels — it feels good. Does it feel good for you, too?”   
  


“You have no idea,” he mumbles. 

He gently pulls back and then pushes into her again and she moans softly.

  
“Rey?” Ben says after a moment.

  
“Mmmmmm?”

“I’m glad you’re my first,” he says softly.

“I’m glad you’re my first, too,” she echoes, and then their lips meet in a gentle, adoring kiss. She rocks her hips, imploring him for more,  _ more,  _ and he presses into her a little faster and harder and God, it’s  _ everything _ . 

She runs her fingers along his shoulders and up and down his arms, desperate to touch every inch of his skin, desperate for more of him.

He looks at her with such an intense, fervent, almost worshipful adoration that  _ scares  _ her. No one’s ever looked at her like that before. 

She feels her orgasm building and she’s so close now. Her hand sneaks forward to rub her clit, but he stops her. 

“Let me,” he murmurs. She moves her hand and cries out when his thumb swirls around that bundle of nerves. “Does that feel good?”

She nods furiously. “Ben — Ben — I’m gonna —  _ oh—” _

There’s an explosion of white behind her eyes as she comes, and she’s vaguely aware of him thrusting harder and then stopping with a groan as he chases her orgasm with his.

He collapses on top of her briefly, his panting breath hot on her neck. He pulls out of her after a moment and lays down on his back, but he quickly pulls her with him, holding her close against his chest. He gently runs his hand up and down her back and she nuzzles against his chest, sighing contentedly.

“How do you feel?” Ben asks softly.

“Amazing. I’m really glad that you were my first.”

He kisses the top of her head. “I’m really glad you were my first, too. Was that your secret?”

Rey nods. “Mm-hmm.”

“What was the other secret, then?”

“The other secret?”

“You said you had two secrets. But you don’t have to tell me if you don’t want to.”

Rey looks up at him and takes a deep breath. “Well...it’s just...I like you. A lot. As more than just the guy who pays my tuition and buys me nice things sometimes. What I feel for you...I’ve never felt this way about anyone else. And I think you’re the kindest, sweetest, most wonderful person I’ve ever met and I just...I want something real with you.”

She’s about to tell him to forget she said anything when Ben smiles a wide, toothy grin that makes her heart stop. “I want that, too, sweetheart. I have from the very first day I met you. I had no idea you would ever feel the same way for me, though. I assumed you just wanted something no-strings-attached, like you specified on your profile.”

“And that’s what I thought I wanted, too — until I met you. And then everything changed. Because I care about you so much, and I don’t want to lose you, even if it scares me to death.”

“It scares you?”

“Yeah, I just — usually my instinct is to push people away, because I’m scared of being abandoned again the way my parents abandoned me as a kid; better to leave before you inevitably get left, you know? But none of the other guys before you were ever worth the risk. But now I just want you, even if I’m scared to death you might leave because I don’t want to lose what we have; I think it’s really special.”

He smiles softly and runs his hand through her hair. “I think it’s special, too. And thank you for telling me that — about your parents. I know that can’t be easy to talk about. Now I understand why you’re scared. But it means a lot to me that you’re willing to be brave for me. And for what it’s worth, I’m not going anywhere.”

She leans forward and gently kisses his lips. 

“So what does this mean?” Ben asks. 

“What do you mean?”

“Like, are we dating now? Do you feel comfortable putting a label on this?”

“If you’re asking me if you’re my boyfriend now, then the answer is yes, Benjamin,” Rey says with a playful smile. 

“Really?”

Rey nods. “If you want to be my boyfriend, that is.”

“Oh, I definitely want to be your boyfriend,” he assures her. “I was just clarifying.”

She smiles. “Good.” 

“I’d really like to keep helping you with your tuition and anything you might need for school because I care about you and I want to be successful and not be saddled with debt forever, and I want to invest in our life together, but if you’d feel weird about your boyfriend paying your tuition, I understand.”

“No, no, I don’t think it’s weird, as long as you don’t feel weird about it? I would definitely still appreciate the help. I really can’t keep working two jobs while going to school full time.”

“Believe me, I am more than happy to help, I just wanted to make sure you were still okay with it. And I’m probably going to keep buying you nice things from time to time, just because I care about you and I can’t help myself.”

A smile peeks across Rey’s lips. “I wouldn’t be opposed to that.”

He kisses her forehead. “Good.” He pauses for a moment and then, “It’s still early. Do you want to watch a movie and order takeout or something?”

“That sounds perfect. But I’m not done cuddling with you yet,” she insists, burying her face against his chest.

He chuckles. “We can cuddle while we’re watching the movie.”

“I don’t want to move.”

“Let me just get my laptop out of my nightstand drawer. We can put something up on Netflix and then we won’t have to move. How does that sound?”

“Even better,” she says with a smile, and he kisses her. “Can we watch  _ Pride and Prejudice _ ?”

“Definitely,” Ben replies. He sits up and pulls his laptop out of the drawer before bringing up Netflix and pressing play. He puts his arm around Rey while she settles her head against his chest, and for the first time in her life, she feels like she is finally home.

* * *

**_The Next Day_ **

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	6. Chapter 6

* * *

**ONE MONTH LATER**

* * *

* * *

**Later That Day**

* * *

* * *

**A Year And a Half Later**

* * *

* * *

* * *

**One Year Later**

* * *

**And they lived happily ever after. The End❤️**


End file.
